Moving out of the familiar…

‘You must follow your spouse”, “New locations always bring you new learning”, “Be open to change”…. Words from every well wisher, family and friend to make me accept the fact that I will be moving out of my home sweet home Bangalore…
I did follow what they said.. I followed them.. these people who have “not” moved out of Bangalore… who love to be there till the end… people who really “feel” for me. How many of us really know what it feels to be relocating to a new place, when you have spent half your life in a beautiful city called Bangalore ?…
I have moved to Singapore.. the land of money and perfection. I am a Tamilian, so it seemed a qualification to be in Singapore ! I am married to a very intelligent person, so  that is a qualification too.. because only intelligent people get opportunities to grow…We dont have kids- another qualification – no added encumberence to worry about ! What more can one ask for, how lucky !!!
I believed in all this too.. I felt lucky and blessed… till I moved out of home sweet home Bangalore. And then it came cascading on my face- my realities, my truth, my need, my comfort… my life !
Most of us Indians have this hope that we can escape to a rich land, make money and then decide whether we want to come back.. or not. How much we hope .. to leave India , for greener pastures… for better ways to buy bigger things in life.. and live the so called “good life”… I am understanding it now.. Now that I have come out of my comfort zone, now that I am seeing what is all this good life… what a delusion !!!
The corner vegetable store, the stationery shop, the home delivered medicines, the local GP visit, the neighborhood electrician and the maid….  all things in life, which we always take for granted , they dont exist in my new life any more ! The only thing that exits now is “Order”… every thing is in order… the bus comes to the bus stop at the time specified, the MRT comes to the station on time, the roads are always clean, the plants are always green, the buildings are all in rows, the trees are all in the same shape, so are the women  and the kids…. everything is in order !
For some one, who has lived life in chaos – dug up roads (for Metro), crazy traffic jams, impertinent autorishaws, and wild drivers.. this peace and order is almost suicidal ! Who needs this perfection….when I have to take a bus, and a train to reach a single shop that sells Indian products, when I have to take a bus and a train (because we live close to where my husband works, away from main city area, and it is expensive to own a car in Singapore) to go to a mall to buy a saucepan/ a laddle, when I have to pay 100 SGD to get an injection (that is Rs.3500/-), when I have to pay a fee of SGD 265 every month to the Government,  to own a maid, apart from her minimum wage of SGD 350… and “to save costs”, my landlord is my handy man – he fixed our toilet, fitted new bulbs, moved furniture between rooms  and drove me to buy things from the hardware store..
I sat down and asked myself, is it worth all this effort…. to learn better ways to buy bigger things in life… when it has become an effort to satisfy the very basic needs of our life…
I think of Bangalore every living moment of my stay here… how much we criticise all that we have.. how much we groan and moan.. and how much we take things for granted…
My love for Bangalore has only increased , with my experience. I realise that is my home.. no where else… that is my place to live.. and die.. that is mine… It is true – new locations always bring you new learning…. and I learned to love Bangalore with out criticism. I learnt to appreciate the ease of living in Bangalore and I thank God for making me a Bangalorean 🙂
    • KK
    • April 19th, 2011

    It is an very old adage that says – “Worth of a thing or person is not known as long as we have it”

    Same goes with all that we call ‘OURS’ or ‘OWN’ in life…..!!!

    But, late than never…now you know the value, hope you cherish it!!! 🙂

    Realization is the first step to eternal happiness… – Oh! I became philosophical…Nice write-up!!


    • mondayhaloween
    • April 19th, 2011

    Thank you… yes I will cherish it.. all my life.. considering i have completed my first half already !
    Nothing like Bangalore.. and yes.. you are right.. I never realised how important was Bangalore in my life…
    Now i know I must always include an adjective – Very Very Important !!!!


  1. Welcome MondayHaloween,

    Nice to see you arund. Interesting reading. Keep them coming.


  2. I am sorry to hear that you terribly miss Bangalore. Well, I am not surprised because I know YOU, and I know that you are a Bangalorean first and a Tamilian second (well, at least that’s how I think of you).

    I guess we miss what we consider home. By that logic I really don’t miss any place because having moved around so much, especially in the last 15 years, I really don’t know where my home is — Cochin, Bangalore, Miami, Wooster, and (next stop) Philly?…I really don’t know! Maybe it’s nice not to have a place to call “home”….at least I wouldn’t miss it the way you do!!


    • Thenmozhi
    • April 26th, 2011

    I too love Bangalore. Although born in Bangalore, but brought up in Tamil Nadu when I moved to Bangalore, the Garden city scared me with its sophistication and cultural differences. Later I got used to it now finding it difficult to imagine a life out of this city. The colourful flowers & greenery especially a big comfort to eyes & mind. Every season has its flowers to offer in Bangalore. Autumn yellow flowers are carpeting to welcome the red may flowers. A moderate speed ride on a Bangalore road is a big tension reliever. But unfortunately the city is losing its charm & concrete jungle creeps in. Inevitable transformation due to compulsions of infrastructural development. M G Road becoming something else one of its major losses is Coffee House which crippled many friendship joints. Metro bridges & cement smell overpowers the sweet ‘sampige’ smell. Still it is our Bangalore. Would not mind quoting the famous Tamil Number which I sing mostly while riding
    “ Alli thanda bhoomi annai allava,
    Solli thanda vaanam thandai allava”

    Bangalore is my mother and father this way. “Namma Bengaluru” today & tomorrow.


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